Main vaapis to aa gaya par mujhe yakeen tha ki wo hamari aakhiri mulakat nahi thi. Din guzre... maheene guzre, hum abhi bhi baat kiya karte the. Ab mujhe koi shak nahi tha ki use mujhse bahed pyaar ho gaya hai. Us ne apne pyaar ka izhaar kai baar kiya ... par maine kabhi bhi usko nahi kaha ki mujhe bhi us se pyar hai. Hota bhi kaise, main kisi aur se jo pyar karta tha. Yeh baat to wo bhi samajh rahi thi ki hamara rishta sifr "physical" rah gaya tha.

Ab aalam yeh tha ki main us se milna bhi chahta tha yeh jante hue ki mujhe us se pyaar nahi hai. Na hi main koi "commitment" de sakta tha use. Ek din maine usko sab kuch sach sach bata diya. Uska dil toot gaya par maine use samjaya ki main yeh baat us se chupa bhi sakta tha aur usko dhooka bhi de sakta tha. Usne meri es baat ko samjha.

Din beetate gaye, ab mujhe us ke saath ki zatoorat padne lagi. Maine usse is baat ka izhaar bhi kiya. Us ne bhi kaha ki wo janti hai ke wo mujhe hameesha ke liye nahi pa sakti, par wo phir bhi zayada se zayada samay mere saath rahna chati hai. Ab tak wo meri bahut hi aachi dost ban chuki the. Wo dost jis se main apni har baat "share" kar sakta tha. Din jaise jaise beet rahe the, hamare milne ki tarap bhi bad rahi thi. Es baar "plan" yeh tha ki hum ghar ke paas hi jayenge taki hum zayada se zayada waqt ek dusre ke saath bita payen. Phir wo din aa hi gaya jab hum mile...

Ek chote se bus ke safar ke baad hum apni manzil par pahuch gaye. Hotel dhoonda aur kamra "book" kiya. Kamre mein pahuchte hi us ne kamre ka darwaza band kiya aur mujhe bed par letne ko kaha. Yeh kah kar ki us ke paas mere liye ek surprise hai... wo bathroom mein chali gayi. Main bataabee see us ka bistar par intzaar kar raha tha. Wo intzaar jo shayad meri zindigi ka sab se bada intzaar tha. Akhir, wo "bathroom" se nikli. Us ne sifr ek Vest ("baniyaan") pahni hui thi. Wo meri vest thi jo pichli baar wo apne saath le gayi thi. Main us ko dektha hi rah gaya. Aisa lag raha tha ki wo es mulaakaat ke liye saari tayari kar ke aaye hai. Wo mare paas aise aayi jaise wo mujhe batana chahti ho, ki usne mujhe itne mahenoo tak kitna miss kiya. Main hameesha se use bahut hi sharmeeli ladki samajhta tha, par aaj, jaise, usne kapdo ke saath saath apni sharam bhi utaar di thi. Maine use aise kbhi bhi nahi deekha tha. Pure do ghante wo mujh pe haavi rahi aur mujhe pyaar karti rahi.

hum log us hotel mein, takreeban, 3-4 din rahe. Ek dopahar, hum dono "swimming pool" mein swimming karne gaye. Mujhe yaad hai, use hotel main, ek uvak mumbai se aaya hua tha. Wo uvak hume aksar hotel mein dekha karta tha. Us uvak ne mujh se baat shuru kari aur apne shahar ki bahut tareef karne laga. Us ne mujhe bataya ki kaise us ka sahar "advance" hai aur kaise wo, aur shahron ko, mumbai ke samne bahut chota samajhta hai. Phir us ne mujh se poocha, ki hamari shaadi ko kitna samay ho gaya hai... maine badi hi vinamrata se kaha ki, hamari shadi nahi hui hai. Yeh sun kar us ke to jaise hosh hi ud gaye... shayad us ne umeed nahi kari the ki hum shadi shda na honte hue bhi ek saath kaise rah rahe the. Mujhe, ab us ka "bade shahar" wala ghamand todna bahut aacha lag raha tha.. Main dil hi dil bahut kush tha.